My Hanai Ohana

I get teased a lot about constantly posting pictures with babies. “Damn, how many grandkids do you have?” is a frequent question. I could say one – or actually one and a half. I could say three. Or I could just as easily say fifteen. Being a grandparent is fun and it is easy even if you don’t have kids.

Sure, I’ve got ‘real’ grandkids and real step-grandkids (they all call me Bully), but why stop there. In my time living in Hawaii, I learned firsthand about the meaning of ‘hanai’ by being accepted into a couple of wonderful families. Hanai is the widespread Hawaiian cultural practice of informal adoption. In Hawaii, having hanai kids is perfectly natural and it can be hard to distinguish them from blood relations.

The concept is pretty simple, when you adopt someone into your heart, you make them family. Now my many hanai kids are growing up and having kids. When my own children were younger, we used to say that they ‘brought home strays.’ Sometimes those friends would seemingly stay forever to be fed, clothed, parented, taken on vacation, and essentially raised as part of our extended family.

Over the years, many of my students and employees have also become an integral part of our hanai ohana. And now these kids are having lots of kids, which is why I have so many pictures. I love them all like they were my own because in a very real sense they are. Opening your heart and home to others will enrich your own life in ways you can hardly imagine. Plus, you get to hold babies.